Tuesday, August 25, 2009

High Drama in C-Store Land


Folks, there has been high drama in c-store land the last few days. I have to admit that one of the main concerns I had with taking this job was a high degree of boredom...and if you know me, you know that boredom only gets me in trouble. The past few days have proved to me that my concerns were totally unfounded. The goings on at ye olde c-store seem more like the plot line of Days of Our Lives...

Like Mountain Dew through the fountain, so are the Days of our Shift!

(Fade in on scene of me and Pro-loft behind the registers...)
ProLoft -- So I got into a fight with my boyfriend and hit him in the arm, but only because i was drunk. Then got pissed and ran barefoot for 2 miles until some guy picked me up and took me to one of our stores where I called an ambulance because i thought i broke my foot. The cops came out with them for some reason and asked me what happened so I told them the whole story and they arrested me for domestic violence...even though my boyfriend didn't want to press charges.
Me -- (insert look of shock and awe) Wow.
Proloft -- Which only goes to show you that you can't be honest with the police.
Me -- (internal monologue...I don't think that was the lesson to learn dear.)
Proloft -- Then i got pulled over at a DUI checkpoint on Saturday night and got a TOC. How was i to know you couldn't have an open container? I didn't go to college.
Me -- (getting into the spirit of the conversation) BASTARDS!
Proloft -- Good thing they didn't check to see if I had prior convictions because i'm not supposed to drink according to my good-faith bail...
CLOSE UP ON ME HOLDING IN THE LAUGHTER THEN FADING OUT

This is my life folks! And only one little peek at what's going on.

There is the Baby Daddy who doesn't really work while he's on the clock, but rather wanders around on his phone and does his errands. He supposedly "purchased" some things from the store and "quit" this weekend. He's now brought in his bank records to prove them wrong and is on a personal rampage to "get rid" of the manager.

The Manager has hired his brother-in-law...a hiring obviously against company policy and Baby Daddy has tattled on him.

I really think that this is the perfect soap opera to run right after Jerry Springer. My ratings would be through the roof, but would i have to pay these folks royalties? Things to consider.

I have tonight off, but will post again tomorrow. I have so much fodder i could quit tomorrow and continue this blog for weeks.

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